Tag: avoidance

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Books Social anxiety

An Excerpt from Social Anxiety Revealed

My non-fiction book, Social Anxiety Revealed, is half price until the end of the month at Smashwords.

“Not for me,” I hear you say. “I don’t have social anxiety.”

That’s where you’re wrong. You might not have social anxiety, but someone you know does. Some family member, friend, colleague or stranger is struggling alone and needs your help, which you’ll be able to provide once you’ve read this book and gained understanding.

Parents and teachers should read the book to help stop children from reaching adulthood with this noose around their necks.

So, grab it now while it’s on sale.

Here, I read from the book. This excerpt is about avoidance.

Remember to get Social Anxiety Revealed while it’s on sale.

Categories
Books Rhymes Social anxiety

Loneliness

In the UK, it’s Mental Health Awareness Week, and this year’s topic is loneliness.

In the US, it’s Mental Health Awareness Month with the message of “Together for Mental Health.”

I always feel social anxiety gets forgotten in any discussion of mental health, and this year it’s more relevant than ever to the topic.

When I had time to be active in a social anxiety online forum, I came across an enormous number of lonely people. Most of those were also alone, while others were alone with their thoughts and emotions.

Why were they lonely? Because social anxiety is that voice in the head that says:

  • They don’t want you.
  • You’re not good enough.
  • They’ll laugh at you.

and similar negative remarks.

Social anxiety leads to avoidance, which leads to loneliness. It’s that simple.

You can turn away from this or decide to help.

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About My Books

I don’t write only about social anxiety, but, as it happens, it crops up in all of these books:

Categories
Social anxiety

Coming Out

Closet

I’m not gay, but I’m coming out. The process has taken about seven years so far and I still don’t feel comfortable saying, “I have social anxiety.”

“What’s that?” is the typical response. No one asks that about being gay. Once the statement is made, it’s understood. Gayness … gaiety… homosexuality has become an accepted state. Similarly, depression is mostly understood. No one has to ask what depression is.

So what is it with SA? Why don’t people know about it? The definition of SA provides the answer. SA is a fear of people and particularly of what those people think of the sufferer. People with SA tend to avoid talking to others and often avoid social contact altogether. So other people don’t know they exist, or they don’t know what they’re thinking, why they’re so quiet.

That’s why SA doesn’t get the recognition it needs – we need – to fight it, destroy it, prevent it from starting even.

Why has it been so hard to come out? Because I’m afraid of the response. Afraid of the thoughts, even if they’re not spoken. Afraid of being thought strange, weird. It goes against my unwritten, unplanned life policy: to pretend to be the same as everyone else. It’s an impossible quest. You can’t miss out on so many basics of growing up and still behave in the accepted way in every situation. And yet, I still try to do it. And I imagine that by keeping quiet I’m not “found out,” although I know that this is untrue.

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I’m going away and might not be able to post again this month. I’ll be back. In the meantime,

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