Author: Miriam Drori

Author, editor, attempter of this thing called life. Social anxiety warrior. Re-Connections, a collection of short stories, published with Ocelot Press, 15/10/2025.

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Books Holidays

The Social Sandwich, Part 6

This is the sixth in a series of posts describing my recent trip to England, Ireland, the Netherlands and Wales, from writing course to school reunion and more.

As I’ve mentioned, I met several people on this trip for the first time, people I knew only online. Of those, there was only one I stayed with: David Rory O’Neill.

I’ve been proofreading and helping to edit David’s books, which he has self-published after being told by traditional publishers that his books don’t fit any genre. I don’t understand this need to straitjacket books. Why can’t one book have enough variety to fit more than one genre? Is it just so that booksellers know which shelf to put the book on?

I digress. David is a prolific writer. He has published 12 novels and 2 novellas so far, and it sounds as if he has plenty more to write. I agreed to work on one book at first, so the fact that I’m still doing this shows how much I enjoy David’s writing. Naturally, David and I have got to know each other quite well through emails. That didn’t stop me from being a little apprehensive about this four-day stay.

From Cork airport, David and B took me into the city, where I was treated to a very knowledgable tour, and to a sip of Guinness, Ireland’s national drink, and taught my only word of Irish: sláinte (pronounced slahn-CHA), which means cheers, or as we would say at home: lehayyim.

Afterwards, we visited the town of Cobh (pronounced Cove) and saw, amongst other things, a fascinating exhibition about the Titanic, situated where the last 123 passengers boarded the ship on its first and last voyage.

The next day, we had a tour of many of the places that appear in David’s novels, and here I felt rather embarrassed. Because, while I enjoyed reading about all of those places and loved the way they blended in to all the stories, I didn’t remember much about them. The real interest, for me is in the characters and their stories. The places are important, but they didn’t remain with me when I finished reading.

Picnicking in Black Valley, County Kerry
Picnicking in Black Valley, County Kerry

On the following day, B took me to Limerick University, where young people were taking part in a festival of traditional Irish music and dance. They sounded and looked very professional. We were even treated to a solo harp performance from a girl who was practising outside. Then we went for a walk along the River Shannon.

Timoleague Abbey, West Cork
Timoleague Abbey, West Cork
(smiling despite being scared of falling back)

Another day of touring the beautiful countryside and all too soon it was time to leave. On the way to the airport, David and B were going to show me the historical part of Mitchelstown, but that plan was hijacked by an interesting stranger.

As we stood beside Kingston College, a row of Georgian terraced houses, wondering who lived in these houses now, this stranger started talking to us. He told us how he and his wife had escaped Zimbabwe/Rhodesia amidst awful scenes and found refuge in one of these houses, along with several others from that country. Then he invited us into his house and showed us pictures of the place they’d had to leave.

So I missed my tour of Mitchelstown, but gained a fascinating first-hand insight into a very different part of the world.

What a lot was crammed into four days! I will remember the special time I spent in a beautiful country, hosted by two lovely people. Thank you, both!

Categories
Books Holidays

The Social Sandwich, Part 5

This is the fifth in a series of posts describing my recent trip to England, Ireland, the Netherlands and Wales, from writing course to school reunion and more.

This is where I get to tell you something amazing.

I met Nicola Morgan!

Yes, I did. Really! She had 45 minutes free before she had to catch her train back to Edinburgh and she spent them with me. And she is even nicer than her Internet persona. I was a little nervous at first, but she put me at ease and the minutes flew by. Wow! Thank you, Nicola!

After that, I had planned to go on to meet the travel writer, Jo Carroll. That didn’t work out because she had scaffolding problems. Although I’m really sorry we didn’t get to meet this time, it would have been hard to be ready in time. As it was, I had time for a proper night’s sleep the night before (needed even more after I was scratched by the cat), and I was able to return after meeting Nicola to organise my suitcase, leaving behind stuff that I could meet up with later, before making my way to Staines. S, whom I knew only through folk dancing, had very kindly invited me to stay with her and her husband. One of her daughters was there, too, and they all made me feel very welcome. The heatwave was still on, so we ate outside in the garden. The evening air was pleasantly cool and the food delicious.

The following day, I used the time I had alone to go for a surprisingly beautiful walk by the river. I say “surprisingly” because I lived near Staines for three years while at university and never realised it was worth visiting. Since I was alone, I was able to jot down notes describing the scenes, making me feel like a real writer. I even wrote the rhythm of a cuckoo’s song:

Cuckoo sound in Staines
On hearing a cuckoo in Staines
(with apologies to Frederick Delius)

At least, I assumed it was a cuckoo, but I’m no bird listener.

In the evening, S took me to her folk dancing group in Slough, which couldn’t have been more different from the one I’m used to. There were about seven people, instead of over a hundred. They were all very friendly, but obviously the atmosphere was very different – much more calm and sedate. And at the end I didn’t feel as if I’d had much exercise, whereas usually I struggle to go up the stairs. Still, I recognised most of the dances and had a lovely time.

To round off their wonderful hospitality, S’s hubby drove me to Heathrow’s Terminal 1 early the next morning (but not early for him) for the next stage of my trip.

Categories
Holidays Reunions Social anxiety

The Social Sandwich, Part 4

This is the fourth in a series of posts describing my recent trip to England, Ireland, the Netherlands and Wales, from writing course to school reunion and more.

A free day! I didn’t have many of those on this trip. In the morning I went to “Ripping Yarns” bookshop, which I’d heard about through Jen Campbell (who works there) and Catdownunder.

Ripping Yarns Bookshop
Ripping Yarns Bookshop

Unfortunately, Jen wasn’t there that day. In fact I was lucky anyone was there because I’d forgotten the shop wasn’t supposed to be open that day. It’s a fascinating shop and well worth a visit if you’re near Highgate Station. I’d have loved to have bought up the whole shop, but I made do with a signed copy of Jen’s book: Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops.

Later, I went to sit in  Hampstead Heath with an ice cream in the continuing heatwave. I sought out the shade, but I noticed a lot of people sitting under the burning sun. I also noticed a lack of sun hats. Mad dogs and Englishmen?

The next day, I took a train and a bus to the Hilton in Watford, so I can say I didn’t go north of Watford on this trip. I’d recently discovered that my A level Applied Maths teacher attends the swimming club there along with her husband, and they invited me to meet them there. They even invited me to breakfast with them afterwards, but I had to refuse because of a prior engagement.

She and I had a very pleasant conversation until near the end when, as old people sometimes do, she said something that upset me, so although they were both very nice, I was glad I wasn’t able to take up their invitation.

From there I went straight to King’s Cross where I met Jean Davison and her husband, Ian, for the first time. We ate in Pizza Express and visited the very interesting Propaganda exhibition in the British Library. In both of those places, the air conditioning was turned up too high, but it made a pleasant change from the heat outside and in the Underground. Afterwards we had tea outside.

With Jean Davison outside the British Museum
With Jean Davison outside the British Library

Ian surprised me by sprouting some expressions in Hebrew. He’d spent two years on a kibbutz some years ago and had remembered them.

A lot of the conversation centred on social anxiety. Jean had always thought of herself as shy until she read about social anxiety on my blog and realised that it describes her much better than “shyness.” In fact, during our conversation, we discovered that she and I have a lot in common.

I enjoyed my afternoon with Jean and Ian very much. I’m so glad we finally met, and hope we can meet again in the near future.

Categories
Holidays

The Social Sandwich, Part 3

This is the third in a series of posts describing my recent trip to England, Ireland, the Netherlands and Wales, from writing course to school reunion and more.

We might have met once as children, but N is ten years younger than me and we wouldn’t have had much in common then. She found me recently on Facebook, unsure who I was but knowing my name was somehow connected to her family. “We’re second cousins,” I wrote back, and we became friends. She sounded pleasant, but it was with a little trepidation that I waited for her to pick me up from Totleigh Barton, along with her husband and son.

I needn’t have worried. They sped me away, along narrow windy roads, from all the tension of the writing course, and chatted away in a very friendly manner. “We do have wider roads in Devon,” N’s hubby assured me later on. “We just haven’t been on any.” It was probably good for me not to have time to dwell on my performance at the course. In fact, I was so busy for the rest of my trip that I didn’t reflect on the course until I returned home.

They took me to Clovelly, a beautiful fishing village accessed by walking down a steep cobblestoned path. Vague memories of having been there before hovered around me. My parents probably took me there one summer when we stayed in Torquay or Ilfracombe. I probably complained about the walk back, up the hill.

Clovelly
Clovelly

While in the village, we had cream tea. This is one of the things I always like to do when I’m in England, and what better place to do it than in Devon, home to clotted cream.

We also walked along the sand and pebbles of Westward Ho beach, and later took their two dogs for a walk in the forest by their house.

In the evening, N and I talked families. She drew me a family tree and told me about the people in it. I did the same. My tree was much larger.

Landacre Bridge
Landacre Bridge
My arm looks burnt in this photo, but it’s really tanned.

The next day, we enjoyed another country walk, and a wary paddle on stony ground, before I caught the train back to London, to the house I stayed in before the course. This time it was full of people.

Categories
Books Holidays

The Social Sandwich, Part 2

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“In my next post, I’ll be eating the top layer,” I wrote at the end of my last post. But, well you can’t really eat a sandwich like that. Or rather, you can but who would? So I’m going to bite into that delicious egg mayonnaise, wholewheat sandwich, even though this post is about the top layer.

The Arvon writing course. A five-day residential course in an old house in the heart of Devon called Totleigh Barton. The topic was: Fiction and Experience. Wow! Where do I start?

I met some lovely people. First of all, there was the couple who run the centre, Claire Berliner and Oliver Meek, and their assistant, Eliza Squire. Then the two tutors, Jean McNeil and Ben Faccini, and the guest tutor, Anjali Joseph. And also the other fourteen students on the course.

In the mornings, the tutors spoke about various topics and set us exercises, some of the results of which we read out loud.  In the afternoons, we did our homework – reading and writing, had tutorials – one each with each tutor, and made dinner when it was our turn. In the evenings, there were more sessions.

The spontaneity required for the exercises wasn’t always forthcoming from my section of the long oak table. But at other times it helped me to learn things about myself that I hadn’t thought about before. The socialising was also rather an effort, but I did my best, outside in warm sunshine on the grass, far away from noise.

Totleigh Barton from afar
Totleigh Barton from afar

I also learned a lot about writing, about some of the things writers have to think about, decisions they need to make.

Everyone involved put a lot of effort into the course and made it a wonderful experience. If that’s what all Arvon courses are like, I heartily recommend going on one – or many.

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I remained in Devon for Part 3 of the Social Sandwich, coming soon.

P.S. Today, on this special birthday, is when life begins, I’ve decided. Up to now, it was all practice.

Categories
Holidays

The Social Sandwich, Part 1

This is the first of a series of posts describing my recent trip to England, Ireland, the Netherlands and Wales, from writing course to school reunion and more.

When you make a sandwich and you have a bit of filling left over, what do you do with it?

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Well, if you’re me, and especially if it’s my favourite – egg mayonnaise – you’ll eat it up first.

My extra filling formed my first two-and-a-half days, starting with an evening with my friend, M1. I’ve known her and her husband since our university days, and they’re both lovely and easy to get on with.

The bus ride to their house was a bit less pleasant. I understand it’s not usual to have air conditioning everywhere in Britain. I understand it’s not usually hot and, as everyone told me, I brought the heat with me. But right next to the seat I happened to sit on in the bus was a grid exuding HOT AIR! And all the other passengers sat there without a care in the world while I, used to heat outside but cool buses, felt sweat pouring off me in bucket loads. Or so it seemed. Never mind. I got there and the rest was fine.

The next morning, I left M1, but would be returning to her later. Leaving my suitcase at Waterloo, I went to meet the first of several people I’d never met before this trip – Rachael (Honest) and her two-year-old son, “Mushroom”.

Two-year-olds don’t make the best adult conversation companions, but we managed to talk a bit. In fact we said quite a lot as Rachael’s account shows, much more than I would have remembered the next day and certainly now that so much time has passed. I was surprised to read about Rachael’s embarrassment over two little episodes during the morning, as I didn’t notice it. I tend to think that only I could get embarrassed over such things. All-in-all, we both enjoyed our time together and I’m sure we’ll meet again in the future.

Isn’t it wonderful how suitcases have wheels these days. I don’t know how we ever managed without them. But what they need to invent now is a suitcase that can be wheeled up and down stairs. One thing I learned as I dragged my suitcase to my next temporary home is not to wear a skirt when you have to take a suitcase on the underground. You see, it gets windy in those tunnels. I was holding on to my skirt as I wheeled my case when I reached some stairs. I wanted to hold on to the handrail to pull myself and the case up. But I needed to stop my skirt from flying up and revealing too much, and I only have two hands.

Fortunately, a young man behind me saw my predicament [sorry – that’s a “Men from the Ministry” joke] and said, “Do you want a hand?”

“I’d love a hand,” I replied. Never have I been more grateful for a hand.

Family members had kindly let me stay in their house while they were away, but I didn’t have much time alone. Just enough to do some washing, because the hot weather meant that I had to keep dipping into the skirts, shorts and tee-shirts section of my suitcase.

The next morning, I met M2, another friend from uni, and we went for a long walk on Hampstead Heath, while catching up on news, and enjoyed lunch at the café at Kenwood and a tour of the grounds.

I returned in time to see the last set of Andy Murray making tennis history. Good for him!

So that was my pre-sandwich experience. In my next post, I’ll be eating the top layer.

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Categories
Books

Sally Quilford is Fifty Today

No, I’m not giving away any secrets. Sally has announced this herself. In fact she’s giving away over fifty writing/book-related prizes to celebrate, so do hop over to Sally’s blog if you want a chance of winning something.

Having met Sally on my recent trip, I have to say that she doesn’t look anywhere near fifty, but I’ll take her word for it!

Coincidentally, I have a special birthday coming up in exactly two weeks. Sixty! I can’t believe it myself.

Back soon with the Social Sandwich 🙂

Categories
Books Holidays

The Importance of a Title

The title of a piece of writing is important. It’s the first thing a potential reader sees. What title will turn that potential reader into an actual reader?

The title could be a pun. It could be a rhyme. It could tell the reader exactly what the piece is about, or it could leave the reader guessing.

I’ve been playing with words, wondering what to call the trip I’m going to blog about. One strong contender is: From Totleigh to Motley. It sounds good and sort of describes the two main events of the trip, although the writing course at Totleigh also involved a motley of people.

But I’ve decided on a different title: The Social Sandwich. The trip began with an intensive group activity and ended with one. In between there were many one-to-one conversations. Groups, too, but nothing as hard as those two.

Sandwich

Categories
Holidays Social anxiety

Loving being back and being awarded

I have a lot to say about this past month. Only trouble is, I don’t know what it’s going to be. So many new and exciting experiences, so many lovely people. I need to organise my thoughts before I start.

In the meantime, I must respond to the award that Rachael was kind enough to bestow on me:

Liebster Award

Rachael, who will also appear at the beginning of my account of the past month, has asked me five questions. Let’s see if I can answer them, despite a dire lack of sleep.

1. What motivates you to write? I started writing because I wanted to raise awareness of social anxiety, and I realised that writing was the way I could do that. I haven’t let go of that goal and it’s still a big motivation, but now other things spur me on, too. I enjoy writing and look forward to putting pen to paper, especially when I do that literally, away from the computer. And belonging to a writing group means that I have to produce work to submit to the group. The comments from the group also keep me on the writing path.

2. What’s the scariest thing you’ve ever done? Well, it’s not skydiving or bungee jumping because I haven’t done those. I don’t think it’s any ride at a funfair. Judging by anxiety levels, I think it could be a job interview – the one in which I had to face five interviewers a once.

3. What’s the best advice (about writing, or life in general) you’ve ever received? This might be the best. It’s been said by many people in many different ways and applies to writing and life in general. Don’t wait for something to happen; make it happen.

4. How would you like to be remembered? That’s easy. As someone who raised awareness of social anxiety.

5. What’s your favourite line (this can be from a poem, a book, or it could be a quote you like)? Possibly this: “A cage went in search of a bird.” It’s by Kafka, but seeing that quote hasn’t encouraged me to read any of his work.

How did I do? I’m surprised I managed to write anything in this state.

Back soon with my account of an exciting month – after catching up on some of the blogs I’ve missed.

Categories
Blogging

Blog Break

I’m taking a break from blogging for a month or so. When I return, I expect to have plenty to tell you about.

Don’t do anything I wouldn’t. Or do things I wouldn’t, but keep safe.

Until then….

Miriam